Bebo is a popular social networking site used primarily by children. Bebo works much like other social networking sites in that users log in and create a stupid page filled with meaningless shit and then spread it around, polluting everything. Like all social networking sites, Bebo ruins lives, turning its users into dribbling, socially handicapped, paranoid, obsessive, whining drones. Every time a user “clicks the mouse” on an “icon” within Bebo – a young animal is churned into the ground by a tractor making room for more phone cables.
Before Bebo, children would run and play in the fields, sniffing buttercups and climbing trees, sharing wholesome adventures before trotting home to their mothers, stopping off at the corner shop to buy a quarter ounce of lemon drops and a pocket full of dreams. Within a year of Bebo’s creation in 2005, every child on earth weighed 18 stones and needed a crane to get out of bed.
“Bebo Children” have heard of buttercups and trees but have never seen them in real life. Occasionally “Cyber Bullies” will download a picture of a tree in order to hang another virtual child from its branches. Bebo children never leave their bedrooms and their diet consists mainly of lard, alcopops and knives. Bebo children don’t wash and most die before the age of twelve having never met their fat parents who are busy creating beautiful versions of themselves on “Second Life” so they can have virtual affairs with beautiful versions of fat parents in other countries.
Bebo works by confusing a child’s mind with swirly colours and flashing imagery before latching into the victims psyche and eradicating all will to explore the earth. Within hours of logging on the child becomes entirely “site dependent,” losing any desire to engage with reality. Bebo’s clever mix of music and graphics rewards the child for every physical impulse it shuts down in favour of the computer screen. Bebo children have often been known to shit themselves and sit in it rather than leave Bebo to visit a toilet. Bebo was created by husband and wife Michael and Xochi Birch who by all accounts sleep soundly every night in their bed made of gold.
The bebo mainframe is switched on twenty four hours per day and runs on children’s blood.
Tuesday 16 December 2008
Friday 5 December 2008
Freedom of Expression
There are over one hundred million “blogs” online. Thanks to the internet, millions of people are able to broadcast across the world that which would previously only have been found written in shit on the walls of an asylum.
Examples of typical blog content.
MIKEY LONG describes himself as a Christan (sic) movie reviewer who wants to save people from the devil by stopping them watching films. Some of Mikey’s criticism of popular film includes describing The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe as “a film about a lion trying to be Jesus which is blasphemy.” He goes on to say that, “This lion called Aslo get on a table and gets tied up like a crusifix then he come back to life like jesus except when jesus did it it was real and is proved in books whereas this is just a fairy story." Mikey finishes the review by stating that, "If you like this film you like the devil becasue of jesus and whorshipping false lions which is forbidden.”
In other reviews Mikey states that Lost in Translation, starring Bill Murray and Scarlett Johansson, “is about a peedofile who chases a young virgin through the gambling city of the devil.” Mikey also informs us that E.T. The Extra Terrestrial is about “a stupid brown rubber toy that shits itself." He goes on to say that, "E.T is this thing with a long finger with a swollen red tip which he uses on a boy which is illegal. His neck grows as well which looks like something.”
TRACY SHORT’S PSYCHIC BLOG OF DESTINY offers the reader “A look behind the curtain at the wonderful world of mediumship”. The author publishes daily transcripts of “actual proved readings” where she “speaks to people’s relatives who have become stuck in the paranormal.” The following was taken from Tracy’s transcript of a session with “Mrs Smith who is my auntie’s best friend’s friend and has got six dogs.”
TRACY : I see an accident… Involving water.
MRS SMITH : No.
TRACY : Right, but something happened didn’t it? Involving water?
MRS SMITH : No.
TRACY : ... Well, no, something did happen with water didn’t it? In the last week?
MRS SMITH : No.
TRACY : You didn’t drink any water? Over the past week. You weren’t thirsty?
MRS SMITH : Well of course I drank some water but -
TRACY : I’ve just proved I can talk to the dead.
BRING BACK THE DEATH PENALTY is a blog by Joe Stringer. Each week Joe shares his thoughts on murderers and how “no one who wants to take someone’s life can ever be recuperated and that’s why I want these people killed.” Joe goes on to say that when he thinks about people who kill, he “can taste blood”. In recent weeks Joe has been trying to form a “lynch mob” in order to deliver “justice” to an old man on his street who was at one time accused of murdering his wife but was later acquitted. Mr Stringer states that “he KNOWS” this man is guilty. He goes on to say that “this man lives at number 19, number 20, or number 22 down my road, I don’t know which. Either way, someone’s going down.” Numerous comments on the site claiming that the man in question was acquitted because his wife was discovered alive and well off the coast of Somalia and that the couple have been living happily together for the last six years - have been ignored.
MEL GIBSON IS THE NEXT JESUS is a blog about Mel Gibson being the next Jesus. The anonymous author of this insightful journal states that “He never would have guessd that lootenant scully from lethal weapen would end up being the saviour of mankind but it’s proved now so that’s the end of it.” In response to comments asking for examples of said proof, the author sites the film What Women Want in which “Mel Gibson heard women's thoughts which is what jesus proved he could do when he was handing out fish and he guessed whether women wanted fish or bread by reading their thoughts (mainly bread).”
Examples of typical blog content.
MIKEY LONG describes himself as a Christan (sic) movie reviewer who wants to save people from the devil by stopping them watching films. Some of Mikey’s criticism of popular film includes describing The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe as “a film about a lion trying to be Jesus which is blasphemy.” He goes on to say that, “This lion called Aslo get on a table and gets tied up like a crusifix then he come back to life like jesus except when jesus did it it was real and is proved in books whereas this is just a fairy story." Mikey finishes the review by stating that, "If you like this film you like the devil becasue of jesus and whorshipping false lions which is forbidden.”
In other reviews Mikey states that Lost in Translation, starring Bill Murray and Scarlett Johansson, “is about a peedofile who chases a young virgin through the gambling city of the devil.” Mikey also informs us that E.T. The Extra Terrestrial is about “a stupid brown rubber toy that shits itself." He goes on to say that, "E.T is this thing with a long finger with a swollen red tip which he uses on a boy which is illegal. His neck grows as well which looks like something.”
TRACY SHORT’S PSYCHIC BLOG OF DESTINY offers the reader “A look behind the curtain at the wonderful world of mediumship”. The author publishes daily transcripts of “actual proved readings” where she “speaks to people’s relatives who have become stuck in the paranormal.” The following was taken from Tracy’s transcript of a session with “Mrs Smith who is my auntie’s best friend’s friend and has got six dogs.”
TRACY : I see an accident… Involving water.
MRS SMITH : No.
TRACY : Right, but something happened didn’t it? Involving water?
MRS SMITH : No.
TRACY : ... Well, no, something did happen with water didn’t it? In the last week?
MRS SMITH : No.
TRACY : You didn’t drink any water? Over the past week. You weren’t thirsty?
MRS SMITH : Well of course I drank some water but -
TRACY : I’ve just proved I can talk to the dead.
BRING BACK THE DEATH PENALTY is a blog by Joe Stringer. Each week Joe shares his thoughts on murderers and how “no one who wants to take someone’s life can ever be recuperated and that’s why I want these people killed.” Joe goes on to say that when he thinks about people who kill, he “can taste blood”. In recent weeks Joe has been trying to form a “lynch mob” in order to deliver “justice” to an old man on his street who was at one time accused of murdering his wife but was later acquitted. Mr Stringer states that “he KNOWS” this man is guilty. He goes on to say that “this man lives at number 19, number 20, or number 22 down my road, I don’t know which. Either way, someone’s going down.” Numerous comments on the site claiming that the man in question was acquitted because his wife was discovered alive and well off the coast of Somalia and that the couple have been living happily together for the last six years - have been ignored.
MEL GIBSON IS THE NEXT JESUS is a blog about Mel Gibson being the next Jesus. The anonymous author of this insightful journal states that “He never would have guessd that lootenant scully from lethal weapen would end up being the saviour of mankind but it’s proved now so that’s the end of it.” In response to comments asking for examples of said proof, the author sites the film What Women Want in which “Mel Gibson heard women's thoughts which is what jesus proved he could do when he was handing out fish and he guessed whether women wanted fish or bread by reading their thoughts (mainly bread).”
Tuesday 2 December 2008
Youtube (General Overview)
Youtube is a kind of 'website' that 'hosts' 'video' clips that 'people' 'enjoy watching'. Many of the clips hosted on Youtube are hilarious 'home videos' made by people without lives.
Youtube also acts as a kind of barometer for society's ills. One of the most popular clips on Youtube is a sixty second piece of video showing a dog pushing its penis into another dog before throwing up onto its back. "Dog fucks another dog and then pukes" has so far been viewed by four hundred million people. Many of these people watched the video once and then, after it had finished, performed a series of clicks in order to watch it again. After watching it again they performed several more clicks and then typed some words in order to "email the link" to their "friends" so that their "friends" could also watch one dog fuck another dog and then puke onto its back.
One day these people will die and will have to account for their lives and they will be asked, "what did you do with this extraordinary gift of life that was granted you?" and they will have to explain with a straight face that they spent their time watching footage of a dog fucking another dog and then puking onto its back. They will then have to explain that after the footage had finished they performed a series of clicks in order to watch it again and after this performed a further series of clicks and typed some words in order to "email the link" to their friends. The guy whose job it is to hear people account for their lives won't really understand what he is being told and probably his first thought will be that he is having the piss taken out of him and he'll probably look around grinning sheepishly and saying "alright, where's the camera?" thinking that this is some sort of setup by Jeremy Beadle (still playing pranks even in the afterlife) but then someone is going to have sit him down and to explain to him that no, this is not a piss-take, this is real, this is actually how these people chose to spend their lives and this guy is not going to be able to comprehend this and it's just going to hit him all at once, the fucking tragic nature of what human beings have become and he'll probably kill himself and that's what youtube has done for the world.
Youtube also acts as a kind of barometer for society's ills. One of the most popular clips on Youtube is a sixty second piece of video showing a dog pushing its penis into another dog before throwing up onto its back. "Dog fucks another dog and then pukes" has so far been viewed by four hundred million people. Many of these people watched the video once and then, after it had finished, performed a series of clicks in order to watch it again. After watching it again they performed several more clicks and then typed some words in order to "email the link" to their "friends" so that their "friends" could also watch one dog fuck another dog and then puke onto its back.
One day these people will die and will have to account for their lives and they will be asked, "what did you do with this extraordinary gift of life that was granted you?" and they will have to explain with a straight face that they spent their time watching footage of a dog fucking another dog and then puking onto its back. They will then have to explain that after the footage had finished they performed a series of clicks in order to watch it again and after this performed a further series of clicks and typed some words in order to "email the link" to their friends. The guy whose job it is to hear people account for their lives won't really understand what he is being told and probably his first thought will be that he is having the piss taken out of him and he'll probably look around grinning sheepishly and saying "alright, where's the camera?" thinking that this is some sort of setup by Jeremy Beadle (still playing pranks even in the afterlife) but then someone is going to have sit him down and to explain to him that no, this is not a piss-take, this is real, this is actually how these people chose to spend their lives and this guy is not going to be able to comprehend this and it's just going to hit him all at once, the fucking tragic nature of what human beings have become and he'll probably kill himself and that's what youtube has done for the world.
LOL
LOL is an 'acronym', an abbreviation for 'Laugh Out Loud'. If you take the initial letter from each of the three words 'Laugh', 'Out', and 'Loud' -
these can be 'abbreviated' into an 'acronym' 'known' 'as 'LOL'. 'LOL' has become 'popular' 'usage' amongst 'people' using the 'internet' as a form of 'communication'.
Usage:
Imagine you are a weak, spineless, easily-hurt-feelings fuck. Perhaps a party has been organised to which you have not received an invite. In this situation - 'LOL' might be used when placing a 'comment' on that person's (the one who didn't invite you) site (MySpace, Facebook, MSN Messenger, Email) as follows -
"Hey, heard you were having a party! Where's my invite! LOL"
By temporarily inhabiting the mind of the sender it is possible to deconstruct the above sentence and decide what information is being conveyed. At face value it appears that firstly, the sender 'heard' the recipient was having a party. Secondly, he is enquiring as to what happened to his invitation and thirdly, he is 'laughing out loud' for no reason. What one must ask is, "did this person actually laugh out loud?" Or, could it be that they are a kind of lier who lies and cheats their way through life.
Even when read at face value, the message indicates that the sender is not happy at his lack of invitation. Whether he is hurt, confused, sad or angry at the lack of invite may not be clear. But what is clear, is that the sender does not have the courage to air the full brunt of his grievance and so has attempted to package it in a kind of ridiculous transparent cotton wool pillow of words by implying that immediately after his gentle enquiry he 'LOL'd. Apparently this person is so care free and easy about the whole situation that it quite literally makes him 'Laugh Out Loud'.
That the sender would credit his reader with so little intelligence as to not see through his 'ruse' is idicative of narcissistic tendencies akin with those found amongst the criminally insane. That the sender is so spineless, weak and pathetic as to be too afraid to reveal the true nature of his feelings for fear of upsetting the recipient is indicative of the cowardice and deep seated insecurity one might find in a three legged dog. Taking into account these two hypotheses one can deduce that anyone who ever used LOL ever in a sentence, regardless of the context, is about two steps shy of popping along to the garden centre to purchase a length of hosepipe (with which to kill themselves).
Translating the little sentences people spread across the web can be fun. Why not try a few yourself? Below are a few more examples to get you started.
Example pack 1. LOL Picture comments.
"Picture comments" are the little sentences people leave under other people's photographs. Angry Web Guide will post an entry on Picture Comments in due course.
a. You look fit LOL
Translation - I genuinely think you look fit but I am too spineless to say so for fear of upsetting the delicate nature of our relationship so I've tried to cover it up as a joke even though everyone on earth knows it's not a joke even the chickens.
b. You look so sexy LOL
Translation - I am wanking.
c. That beach looks great. Wish I was there with you LOL
Translation - I am wanking and crying. My penis is in my hand and I am weeping - I'm not laughing at all. I've always liked you. Why do you not SEE IT. You go to the BEACH in your COSTUME and I'm alone in the DARK etc
d. I wish I was that bicycle (chair, wall, towel, pair of panties etc) LOL
Translation. I deserve to die, seriously it would be best for everyone.
LOL Non Picture comments.
e.g. msn comments, wall comments, one line emails.
a. Hey haven't heard from you in while. TALK TO ME!!! LOL
Translation - Every night, I sit alone in my room, wanking and crying, waiting for you to contact me. I refresh the screen every minute or so. I have no life. Laughing am I? (NB - note use of exclamation marks as a further attempt to divert the reader's attention from the true meaning of the message. Anyone who uses exclamation marks, regardless of he context, should be killed) See post on "Exclamation Marks" for further information.
b. Hey, why aren't I in your top friends? LOL
Translation - It is essential to me that I appear in your top friends. I do not know how to function without my digital photograph being placed in a list of eight other digital photographs on your stupid social networking site. I'm not laughing, I dunno why I said that, this isn't funny. I've been thinking about seeing a doctor.
these can be 'abbreviated' into an 'acronym' 'known' 'as 'LOL'. 'LOL' has become 'popular' 'usage' amongst 'people' using the 'internet' as a form of 'communication'.
Usage:
Imagine you are a weak, spineless, easily-hurt-feelings fuck. Perhaps a party has been organised to which you have not received an invite. In this situation - 'LOL' might be used when placing a 'comment' on that person's (the one who didn't invite you) site (MySpace, Facebook, MSN Messenger, Email) as follows -
"Hey, heard you were having a party! Where's my invite! LOL"
By temporarily inhabiting the mind of the sender it is possible to deconstruct the above sentence and decide what information is being conveyed. At face value it appears that firstly, the sender 'heard' the recipient was having a party. Secondly, he is enquiring as to what happened to his invitation and thirdly, he is 'laughing out loud' for no reason. What one must ask is, "did this person actually laugh out loud?" Or, could it be that they are a kind of lier who lies and cheats their way through life.
Even when read at face value, the message indicates that the sender is not happy at his lack of invitation. Whether he is hurt, confused, sad or angry at the lack of invite may not be clear. But what is clear, is that the sender does not have the courage to air the full brunt of his grievance and so has attempted to package it in a kind of ridiculous transparent cotton wool pillow of words by implying that immediately after his gentle enquiry he 'LOL'd. Apparently this person is so care free and easy about the whole situation that it quite literally makes him 'Laugh Out Loud'.
That the sender would credit his reader with so little intelligence as to not see through his 'ruse' is idicative of narcissistic tendencies akin with those found amongst the criminally insane. That the sender is so spineless, weak and pathetic as to be too afraid to reveal the true nature of his feelings for fear of upsetting the recipient is indicative of the cowardice and deep seated insecurity one might find in a three legged dog. Taking into account these two hypotheses one can deduce that anyone who ever used LOL ever in a sentence, regardless of the context, is about two steps shy of popping along to the garden centre to purchase a length of hosepipe (with which to kill themselves).
Translating the little sentences people spread across the web can be fun. Why not try a few yourself? Below are a few more examples to get you started.
Example pack 1. LOL Picture comments.
"Picture comments" are the little sentences people leave under other people's photographs. Angry Web Guide will post an entry on Picture Comments in due course.
a. You look fit LOL
Translation - I genuinely think you look fit but I am too spineless to say so for fear of upsetting the delicate nature of our relationship so I've tried to cover it up as a joke even though everyone on earth knows it's not a joke even the chickens.
b. You look so sexy LOL
Translation - I am wanking.
c. That beach looks great. Wish I was there with you LOL
Translation - I am wanking and crying. My penis is in my hand and I am weeping - I'm not laughing at all. I've always liked you. Why do you not SEE IT. You go to the BEACH in your COSTUME and I'm alone in the DARK etc
d. I wish I was that bicycle (chair, wall, towel, pair of panties etc) LOL
Translation. I deserve to die, seriously it would be best for everyone.
LOL Non Picture comments.
e.g. msn comments, wall comments, one line emails.
a. Hey haven't heard from you in while. TALK TO ME!!! LOL
Translation - Every night, I sit alone in my room, wanking and crying, waiting for you to contact me. I refresh the screen every minute or so. I have no life. Laughing am I? (NB - note use of exclamation marks as a further attempt to divert the reader's attention from the true meaning of the message. Anyone who uses exclamation marks, regardless of he context, should be killed) See post on "Exclamation Marks" for further information.
b. Hey, why aren't I in your top friends? LOL
Translation - It is essential to me that I appear in your top friends. I do not know how to function without my digital photograph being placed in a list of eight other digital photographs on your stupid social networking site. I'm not laughing, I dunno why I said that, this isn't funny. I've been thinking about seeing a doctor.
Sunday 30 November 2008
Discussion forums.
Discussion Forums are "forums" used by "people" on the "internet" to "discuss things".
Discussion forms are primarily used by people who are afraid of death. The most valued form of debate is one that can offer no resolution. By joining these debates the participants ensure that they will never have to stop and think about their mortality until they die at the keyboard.
Discussion forms are primarily used by people who are afraid of death. The most valued form of debate is one that can offer no resolution. By joining these debates the participants ensure that they will never have to stop and think about their mortality until they die at the keyboard.
Example.
Below is an excerpt of a discussion on Richard Dawkins' book "The God Delusion". The discussion is hosted by Amazon.co.uk. By discussing the question of "God's existence" the participants ensure the debate will never end. Angry Web Guide joined the discussion using the psuedonym, WAKEUP! The purpose of WAKEUP!'s input was to test how willing the participants were to continue with an argument no matter how ridiculous it became. Also, winding up athiests is funny. Note that at no time does anyone question WAKEUP!'s authenticity, blinded as they are by their own point of view.
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In reply to an earlier post on 4 Nov 2008 16:24 BST
RATIONAL says:
I wonder how long Amazon will let this thread go on? I seldom get an opportunity to debate this for so long before believers clear off.
Allow me to finish this with the following: Epicures, 300 BCE: "The gods can either take away evil from the world and will not, or, being willing to do so, cannot; or they neither can nor will, or lastly, they are both able and willing. If they have the will to remove evil and cannot, then they are not omnipotent. If they can, but will not, than they are not benevolent. If they are neither able nor willing, then they are neither omnipotent nor benevolent. Lastly, if they are both able and willing to annihilate evil, how does it exist?"
"God" is impossible. Please, please, feel free to disprove anything I've posted. If you can't, please look at what you believe in and lead a good wholesome life that benefits humankind and our lovely planet. As Dawkins points out – isn’t the garden beautiful enough without the need for fairies at the bottom of it??
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In reply to an earlier post on 4 Nov 2008 16:26 BST
PEACE&LOVE says:
Have you read chapter 19 from Genesis, from a recent translation of the Bible by George M. Lamsa? I suggest that you get if you are truly interested in the Bible because it clears up misconceptions about the Bible mainly caused by lacking or bad translations. I recommend it highly. Many things are the same, but there are also new things in there. Also, I think it is not so expensive.
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In reply to an earlier post on 4 Nov 2008 16:28 BST
Last edited by the author on 4 Nov 200816:28 BST
RATIONAL says:
PEACE&LOVE, none of this new translation answers any of the points that have been debated in this thread. You are ignoring undeniable logic in favour of rhetoric. This is the action that occurs so often when "believers" are challenged to the point where they have no valid argument. They then fall back on the mysteries of the lord and the devils tempting nature.If you have anything, and I mean anything, to contradict the arguments in this thread against the existence of the christian "god", then please share.
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Your post, in reply to an earlier post on 4 Nov 2008 16:30 BST
WAKEUP! says:
RATIONAL - You certainly seem to know your stuff. I do have one question.
Would you really say any of this to Jesus' FACE????
Case closed me thinks. ;)
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In reply to your post on 4 Nov 2008 16:31 BST
JOSEPH says:
How on earth can he say any of this to Jesus's face when he died 2000 years ago? He wasn't a god. Why not read some of these posts before coming to play on here?
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Your post, in reply to an earlier post on 4 Nov 200816:32 BST
WAKEUP! says:
JOSEPH - You and I both know becasue of his aura that you'd be on your knees becasue of not understanding his language which is the language of Jesus. Scientists proved that God's language couldn't be understood by any man when they did tests which are on the internet which I'm going to find the link for to put an end to this but really i don't have to becasue of God.
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In reply to your post on 4 Nov 2008 16:31 BST
DAWKINSFAN says:
WAKE UP! – Congratulations, you just made the most pointless and ridiculous contribution to this forum thus far!
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Your post, in reply to an earlier post on 4 Nov 2008 16:33 BST
WAKEUP! says:
DAWKINSFAN - On the contrary Sir. I am just getting warmed up! Listen - If someone does a pooh - And at the EXACT same time someone on the OTHER SIDE of the earth does a wee even though the two people have NEVER met - then how else can you explain that apart from Jesus??? Dawkins should be punished for what he's done and will be punished by the devil if God has anything to do with it. Last night God visited me on the toliet (not him on the toliet, me, he doesn't need to go) and made me realise about the pooh and wee thing. Dawkins doesn't even address this in his book probably (I haven't read it)
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Your post, in reply to an earlier post on 4 Nov 2008 16:35 BST
WAKEUP! says:
Joseph I can't find the link about the sceince tests on God's language but it's still a fact which is proved. If you need more hard evidence my mum's BEST FREIND said to her that she was worried she would get in a car accident because she needed new glasses but didn't have time to get them. Six month's later she DID have an accident. She had predicted it from God's clues. How can you possibly explain that? One day Dawkins could have an accident becasue he didn't listen. I am a christan and I don't want anything bad to happen to Mr Dawkins I'm sorry for what I said earlier although I do think that the devil would hurt him if he doesn't change his ways. I don't want Dawkins to go through what my Mum's friend went through with her bad hip which is still not healed almost a year later.
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In reply to an earlier post on 4 Nov 2008 16:33 BST
UNDECIDED says:
I have read this discussion over the past week with great interest. I am undecided on what I believe in, and its something that has evolved (excuse the pun) over time. I never beleievd in a god at all until recently. I am not sure I do now. I think I am going to read a Chesterton book and then read a Dawkins book and hope that helps. Should I also read Darwin’s Origin Of The Species?? I worry that I do not know enough about the theory of evolution.
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In reply to an earlier post on 4 Nov 2008 16:37 BST
COMMONSENSE says:
UNDECIDED – May I commend your willingness to consider all sides of this fascinating debate. Whatever you decide I’m sure you’ll find Dawkin’s book to be a highly absorbing read. And yes, you should definitely read Origin of The Species!
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Your post, in reply to an earlier post on 4 Nov 2008 16:40 BST
WAKEUP! says:
I CANNOT BELIEVE some of the things I am reading on here. UNDECIDED please don’t waste any more time and read my PROOF argument from pooh. CASE CLOSED!!
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In reply to your post on 4 Nov 2008 16:42 BST
GOODATHIEST says:
The argument from Pooh. God is getting better, I see. Can I request that you and God stay in the toilet?
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In reply to your post on 4 Nov 2008 16:45 BST
PD PRICE says:
You can't expect a serious reply to this until you can place your argument on a sound epistemological foundation! That you have entered into this discussion WITHOUT EVEN HAVING READ THE BOOK is as astonishing as it is insulting! Might I also suggest you learn to spell toilet correctly!
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In reply to your post on 4 Nov 2008 16:45 BST
M HARRIS says:
WAKEUP!Please return to using your medication. Either that or the illegal ones you are on have well and truly taken you to another world.On your Mum’s friend’s driving accident - was the clue she received something about not being able to see properly?? Funny that. Here is a prediction. Put a blindfold on and go for a drive. You WILL have an accident that very same day!!! (Obviously don't actually go out driving with a blindfold on).
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In reply to your post on 4 Nov 2008 16:46 BST
N HEARTS says:
WAKEUP! - If you are going to contribute anything further to this discussion, the onus is entirely upon you not to write further drivel like this. If you feel you can't do so, stay in your toilet. As for your charge that Dawkins should be punished for writing his book it just goes to show that in some quarters we have not moved one iota from religious dark age thinking. In short it demonstrates just why we need this book by Dawkins and the many others which expose the hate that fuels so much (I do not say all) religion. Your apology is welcomed but you should not have made the statement in the first place. In the meantime, since you have slagged it off without having read it, you should buy a copy of the book and attempt to read it with an open mind. You never know it may do you some good.
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In reply to an earlier post on 4 Nov 2008 16:48 BST
RATIONAL says:
Might we return to the core of this debate rather than getting involved in mindless tittle tattle?
Bottom line: God cannot exist in the way described in the christian faith - it is simply impossible. If you genuinely wish to better yourself, self-honesty is a good place to start, not self-delusion. Study the bible with your eyes and ears open and compare it to what is happening all around you.PEACE&LOVE - On a final note (I think, unless I can't stay away..), I notice that you continue to ignore my earlier posts regarding the impossibility of god.Rather than debate the bible, let's hear your responses to the points I have raised.I have no idea what that chap's post about the toilet was for? I suggest we ignore it. Some serious issues there I think.
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Your post, in reply to an earlier post on 4 Nov 2008 16:50 BST
WAKEUP! says:
I agree with RATIONAL. This is so silly. On and on with the same argument, back and forth. We should be playing in the garden. GOD's garden. I think if you look in your hearts, even those of you who read this silly book, look deep in your hearts you'll feel a sense of calm come over you. You'll smile and know that God exists becasue of all the overwhelming evidence around you, just as RATIONAL points out. Dawkins and Darwin are just MEN. That’s all. After darwin wrote his theory about Monkey men (Monkey men? Come on guys THINK) he still would have had to go about his day, eating and going to the toilet to pooh. God meanwhile, MADE THE EARTH IN SIX DAYS and NOT ONCE did he have to go to the toilet. Nothin that goes to the toilet can be truly great and no man, no matter what his achievements, can deny that after achieving them he was forced to sit on a toilet, just as every other pathetic man on earth. God introduced toilets for this very reason, so that man would know his place. Again, let me say - CASE CLOSED!!!
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In reply to your post on 4 Nov 2008 16:52 BST
RATIONAL says:
WAKEUP kindly READ my posts before quoting my name – I AM NOT ON YOUR SIDE!
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Your post, in reply to an earlier post on 4 Nov 2008 16:53 BST
WAKEUP! says:
HERE HERE RATIONAL! You and me TOGETHER!!!
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In reply to your post on 4 Nov 2008 16:53 BST
GOODATHIEST says:
Out of interest - how do you know god never goes to the toilet?
You replied with a later post
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Your post, in reply to an earlier post on 4 Nov 2008 16:55 BST
WAKEUP! says:
How do both RATIONAL and I know God never goes to the toliet??? 1. It is not mentioned in the bible which is the word of God. 2. Jesus never went to the toilet and he is the son of God. 3. The wise men bought three gifts - gold, frankenstine and mur. They didn't bring nappies which is what my auntie brought round when Mum gave birth to my baby brother. 4. The rain is NOT god's wee as has been argued but if it was, Dawkins makes no attempt to explain this in his book probably which is basically proof of God. God doesn't go to the toliet but the rain IS actually (I forgot) a sort of toilet but not like china ones for human. God's rain remains the only clear proof I admit that. There's no other way to proove god really accept the rain. And the sun and planets and humans. Everything really because he made it all which it says in the bible. He did it in six days! How else could he do that if it wasn't for jesus? What you don't seem t understand is GOD is just like us. Of course he goes to the toilet and the proof is there in the rain and snow (God’s wee and pooh) which fall from the sky. But it doesn't change the fact about Darwin and toilets because in his days they didn’t have china bowls only a hole in the ground which is indignified especially when you add in all this nonsense about planet of the apes.
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In reply to your post on 4 Nov 2008 16:57 BST
JOSEPH says:
And bang goes a sensible and rewarding debate because some clown thinks he has a sense of humour. You really aren't adding anything with this childish attempt at humour. Maybe you should just read other peoples' posts and leave the silliness out of it?
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In reply to your post on 4 Nov 2008 17:05 BST
L.B HOLMES says:
WAKEUP! maybe Mum and Dad told you this, and I don't want to step on their toes, but this is fantastic stuff. Please keep a copy of this post and read it again when your 50yrs old. It is precious!I've been involved in some hefty debates, but I can (mostly) always manage a conciliatory laugh afterwards. Many of my friends are religious, and even though we are passionate with our views, a sojourn of good humour allows a lasting relationship.This obsession with God's wee, Darwin's pooh and Jesus' lack of both has brightened my working day. I do have a quick question though: Why did the three wise men bring FrankensTINE (sic) as a gift? Seems a little inappropriate, as does not bringing nappies.
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At this point Angry Web Guide left the discussion due to incredulity.
Thursday 27 November 2008
Friday 14 November 2008
Facebook (General Overview)
Facebook is a social networking website launched in 2004 which has made everything worse. The site is mainly used by social lepers to create the illusion that they have lives. Though nothing has been proved, Facebook is almost certainly the main cause of suicides in the western world and should probably be taken down except that people don't want to lose all their little pictures and things so it stays up.
Facebook is free to sign up to but users 'banner ads' to generate revenue. Banner ads attack the subconsious with flashing mindfuck beams which persuade you to start masturbating.
Mark Zuckerburg founded Facebook while he was a student at Harvard University. Mark had just broken up with his girlfriend and was feeling bitter so he came up with the idea of Facebook so that everyone else's relationship would fail too after they saw a comment on some other bloke's wall saying that Michelle had slept with Tony.
The main aim of Facebook is to make the user feel bad about themselves. Frequent users report feelings of social anxiety, inferiority, depression, 'wall' and 'news feed' addiction and wanting to kill.
Membership of Facebook was initially restricted to those attending Harvard College somewhere in America. Harvard was and is attended mainly by arseholes and it is this fact that leads many to suppose that Facebook was originally intended as a kind of government sponsored e-culling machine developed to sift and and destroy privileged fucks. However by 2005 someone had pointed out that the whole world was filled with arseholes and when it came down to it, it would be better if everyone was attacked and so Facebook's meteoric rise to global domination was assured.
Facebook works like a kind of 'virtual allotment' in that a user's page needs constant upkeep and attention else evil weeds of doubt and regret begin to sprout from the acid soil and strangle your heart.
Photographs -
When people first started putting their photographs on facebook, they only chose the very best ones. This lead to other users leaving highly complementary comments under each other's photographs which made everyone feel really good about themselves. Facebook immediately sought to address this problem by introducing a 'tagging system' whereby anyone could just tag any picture of you they wanted which meant people could see you as you really were - a lying deformed troll.
Facebook headquarters are based in California. Arnold Schwarzenegger is the Governor of California.
Facebook users can create personal profiles which list "things they like" and sometimes describe "what they think" about things. Users can also join 'groups' with a view to forming lynch mobs to burn down paediatrician's houses. Facebook is also often used to get gang's of kids together so they can go round some kid's house while his parents are away and just smash the place up and shit everywhere.
One way Facebook users communicate is by 'poking' each other using the virtual 'poke' facility which sounds funny at first but becomes less amusing each time you hear it.
Facebook users have an update-able 'status' which they can "update and that". It's kind of like having everyone you've ever met surrounding you all at once, dancing around with gritted teeth and sticks, whispering incessantly into your ears until they bleed, constantly narrating every minute facet of their meaningless little lives as you crumble to the ground and realise that this will NEVER EVER STOP.
Other fun features of Facebook are that people can break into it and steal all your bank details. Old people probably shouldn't use it because they don't understand anything and are like children.
Facebook is free to sign up to but users 'banner ads' to generate revenue. Banner ads attack the subconsious with flashing mindfuck beams which persuade you to start masturbating.
Mark Zuckerburg founded Facebook while he was a student at Harvard University. Mark had just broken up with his girlfriend and was feeling bitter so he came up with the idea of Facebook so that everyone else's relationship would fail too after they saw a comment on some other bloke's wall saying that Michelle had slept with Tony.
The main aim of Facebook is to make the user feel bad about themselves. Frequent users report feelings of social anxiety, inferiority, depression, 'wall' and 'news feed' addiction and wanting to kill.
Membership of Facebook was initially restricted to those attending Harvard College somewhere in America. Harvard was and is attended mainly by arseholes and it is this fact that leads many to suppose that Facebook was originally intended as a kind of government sponsored e-culling machine developed to sift and and destroy privileged fucks. However by 2005 someone had pointed out that the whole world was filled with arseholes and when it came down to it, it would be better if everyone was attacked and so Facebook's meteoric rise to global domination was assured.
Facebook works like a kind of 'virtual allotment' in that a user's page needs constant upkeep and attention else evil weeds of doubt and regret begin to sprout from the acid soil and strangle your heart.
Photographs -
When people first started putting their photographs on facebook, they only chose the very best ones. This lead to other users leaving highly complementary comments under each other's photographs which made everyone feel really good about themselves. Facebook immediately sought to address this problem by introducing a 'tagging system' whereby anyone could just tag any picture of you they wanted which meant people could see you as you really were - a lying deformed troll.
Facebook headquarters are based in California. Arnold Schwarzenegger is the Governor of California.
Facebook users can create personal profiles which list "things they like" and sometimes describe "what they think" about things. Users can also join 'groups' with a view to forming lynch mobs to burn down paediatrician's houses. Facebook is also often used to get gang's of kids together so they can go round some kid's house while his parents are away and just smash the place up and shit everywhere.
One way Facebook users communicate is by 'poking' each other using the virtual 'poke' facility which sounds funny at first but becomes less amusing each time you hear it.
Facebook users have an update-able 'status' which they can "update and that". It's kind of like having everyone you've ever met surrounding you all at once, dancing around with gritted teeth and sticks, whispering incessantly into your ears until they bleed, constantly narrating every minute facet of their meaningless little lives as you crumble to the ground and realise that this will NEVER EVER STOP.
Other fun features of Facebook are that people can break into it and steal all your bank details. Old people probably shouldn't use it because they don't understand anything and are like children.
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